Best Slogan For Lawyers?

“All I want for my birthday is a case.” (Jay L. Zagorsky)

What’s the best lawyer joke?

An elderly woman was at her beach house and was desperate for some ice cream. She called her son to come over and get some, but he had just come back from lunch with his new girlfriend who happened to be a good friend of the family that owned the only place where she could buy ice cream in town. When she told him this, he told his mother that if she wanted any more ice cream they would have to go out again. “But son,” said his mother, “I can’t very well put on my bathing suit now!”

Why are lawyers so successful? Lawyers aren’t really trying to help people—they’re just trying not to screw them up too badly!

How do you keep lawyers off your land? Field three hundred lawsuits around it!

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? His lips are moving . . . or maybe they’re not, you never know with those guys.

Who stole the cookie jar from under my bed yesterday morning while I was sleeping? That sneaky attorney of mine! He came into our bedroom without knocking like an angel out of heaven took hold of him by one ankle and dragged him down through all seven levels of hell until he landed right next door in front of me as sweet as pie with about half-a-dozen Milky Ways tucked

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